Let’s start with a familiar picture: you’re new in town, maybe it’s freshman year of college, a new job, or a new stage of life. You’re sitting in your car, wondering why you feel so isolated. No close friends nearby, no local church to lean on, and you’re scrolling through Instagram or TikTok where everyone else seems to have it all figured out. Maybe you’re going through the motions, trying to keep up, but the connection just isn’t there. We’ve all been there—or somewhere close.

Here’s another scenario. Think about group projects. Most of us have had that one project we ended up doing mostly (if not entirely) by ourselves—we stayed up super late, put in all the work, and found ourselves frustrated and exhausted. And here’s what’s interesting—Faith can feel that way, too, especially when it seems like no one else is there to share the load, check in, follow up, or care about how you’re actually doing.

But the truth can change everything: God designed our faith to be shared, to be lived out with others.

I know what it’s like to be surrounded by people (even Christian friends) and feel totally alone. It can seem like everyone else is living a picture-perfect life, filled with friends and moments of strong faith, but when we’re alone, it’s a different story. Trying to follow Jesus while feeling isolated can make faith itself feel disorienting or even discouraging.

But if you’re feeling this way, here’s the good news: God never meant for us to do faith alone. Following Jesus was always meant to be a group project.

There’s no better place to see this “group project” approach than in Acts 2:42-47, where we get a glimpse into the very first church community. It’s where we find the beauty of what a life together, in Jesus, can look like. We get a snapshot of the first church in Jerusalem—a close-knit community that grew rapidly after the Holy Spirit came, and people began turning to Christ. But here’s something unique about the church: it wasn’t simply a building; it was a family. And it should still be the same today.

People believed in Jesus individually, yes, but they lived it out collectively, forming the very first local church (and no, this family didn’t all live in one house. They lived all over the city, came together, and met in homes). And it wasn’t exactly a popular move—the religious culture in Jerusalem was skeptical, even hostile. Yet these early believers kept showing up for each other, creating a community that looked totally different from anything else around. The church was never just a building (like we often say, “Are you going to church this Sunday?”). The church is a group of people who do life together. Here are three distinct markers of this first church community in Jerusalem:

1. They Centered on the Word & Worship

“All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders.”- Acts 2:42-43

The early church prioritized gathering around the teachings of Jesus, prayer, and the Lord’s Supper. The church community was devoted. This wasn’t just an occasional gathering; it was the pattern of their lives. They listened to the apostles (their leaders) who shared what Jesus had taught, and they experienced God’s presence in community, which led to a collective sense of awe and worship.

Through this togetherness, God moved powerfully among them. Wouldn’t it be nice if you could say that you were tangibly seeing God move in power? Being plugged into a local church doesn’t mean you will 100% for sure see God move, but it does mean you can be confident you’re doing something that’s in line with His design and will for believers. God’s model for Christianity, from the very beginning of its existence, involved Christians gathering together in the context of local Churches (local groups of believers) opening His Word and being amazed as He moved. So, it’s worth asking ourselves: Who are we listening to, and are those voices drawing us closer to God? Who do we surround ourselves with, and are they building up our faith?

As the early church gathered, they’d share communion. Jesus first taught about communion during the Last Supper, which He shared with His disciples just before He was arrested. Communion (also called the Lord’s Supper) is a way for His followers to remember His love and sacrifice. During the Last Supper, Jesus took some bread, broke it, and told His disciples, “This is my body, which is given for you; do this in remembrance of me” (Luke 22:19). Then He took a cup of wine and said, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you” (Luke 22:20). These simple things—bread and wine—became symbols to help us remember the huge sacrifice Jesus was about to make on the cross. He wanted His followers to use this meal to remember what He did for us and to reflect on His incredible love.

Jesus might’ve used bread and wine because they are easy to find and share, but they also have special meaning. The bread stands for Jesus’ body that was broken for us, and the wine stands for His blood, which was shed for the forgiveness of our sins. When we take communion, we remember His love and sacrifice and the new relationship (or covenant) that we have with God because of Jesus. Really, communion is a reminder of the gospel, that God loved us so much He sent His one and only son to die on the cross, taking the punishment we deserve for our sins. He rose again, defeating death, so that those who believe in Him can have life and life to the full (Romans 10:9-10).

Christianity isn’t about earning our way to God or doing religious practices so God will like us more. We could never and will never measure up (Ephesians 2:8-9). Even on our “best” days we fall short. We’re saved by our faith, not our works or performance. But, if you’re a Christian, God isn’t holding your sinful choices against you. The picture communion calls to mind, of Jesus on the cross, is the ultimate example of forgiveness. Jesus forgave us for our sins. We don’t have to measure up.  No one can.

Today, it can be easy to live with an “it’s just me and Jesus” mentality. And I get it, maybe you’ve been hurt. Or hurt by someone in the Church—the other people in the church can’t measure up to God’s perfect standard either. So first, I just want to say, if that’s you, I’m so sorry that you’ve been hurt, seemingly by the church. It’s painful when a place that’s supposed to feel safe, accepting, and loving ends up causing hurt instead. You’re not alone in feeling this way. So many people have gone through similar experiences, and it’s completely understandable to feel confused, sad, or even distant from church because of it.

But please know, the heart of Jesus is gentle, kind, and never condemning. People aren’t perfect, even in church, but that doesn’t change how much God loves you and wants you to experience real community. Healing takes time, but God’s desire for you is forgiveness and healing. So as you process and heal, try to lean on other believers who bring you peace and encouragement. You might be tempted to “throw the baby out with the bathwater,” as the saying goes—to throw out all churches after being burned by one or two, maybe even three. If that’s you, spend some time journaling your thoughts, hurts, and worries in a prayer to the Lord. Ask Him to give you the courage to forgive and then to either seek reconciliation with those who hurt you or pursue a new local church. I’m praying He’ll guide you in this decision.

Let’s get back to the early church in Acts.

2. They Practiced Radical Sharing & Caring

“And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need.” – Acts 2:44-45

In a world where resources can feel scarce and the focus can often be self-centered, these believers practiced radical generosity. They didn’t isolate themselves (solely sitting with Jesus in a coffee shop) or protect their possessions (storing up journals and Bible studies that collected dust on their shelves); instead, they shared what they had so no one went without. This wasn’t a token gesture but a commitment to real, practical care. It showed they understood community isn’t just a concept; it’s a practice that comes to life in how we show up for each other.

Imagine what it would look like if all the girls in your dorm who knew Jesus freely shared their clothes or notes from class. What would the non-Christians think? Or maybe you’re like me, and you’re not in undergrad anymore. You’re a working professional? What might radical generosity look like with your neighbors or community group? Ask yourself: Are you trying to do life alone, or are you finding ways to connect with those in your church, offering and receiving support?

 Now these are good examples to get those wheels turning, to get some ideas going. But don’t miss this—the early Christians were practicing this radical generosity in the context of a local church. You see, while a group of believers (who aren’t from the same church) can come together and do some amazing things (like fund Bible translation, raise school supplies for a needy community, or donate clothes to a women’s shelter), the kind of generosity we’re reading about in Acts 2 was different. Their generosity was centered around the local believers (who were part of the same congregation) caring for each other.

Local churches provide us with levels of care. Through the local church we experience the teaching of the Word (catered to believers in the same shared cultural context – not a podcast streamed from across the country to a different audience). In the local church we get to be shepherded by church leaders who help us grow in Christlikeness and we get to be encouraged by our local brothers and sisters in Christ! And that’s just a few examples in addition to those described in Acts 2.

3. They Created a Habit of Hanging Out

“They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity—all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.” – Acts 2:46-47

The first church wasn’t just meeting once a week; they had a habit of being together. Every day, they worshiped in the Temple, gathered in homes, and shared meals. This wasn’t a compartmentalized faith—it was an all-day, everyday kind of thing. Today, many Christians are tempted to turn their faith on or off depending on the day of the week—it’s easy to turn up the volume of our faith on Sundays when we’re going to Church. But for the early church? The joy, generosity, and authenticity of their lives together was something others couldn’t ignore. People around them noticed and were drawn in by the way these Christians lived, curious to know what made them different. And every day, more people joined them, finding faith in Jesus. Reflect on this: When others look at your life and your community, do they see something that points them to Jesus? Are they drawn in by the way you live out your faith?

 The early church gives us a model: We’re meant to follow Jesus together. Being a believer (among other traits) means being marked by three things: centering on the Word and worship (gathering with a local church body), sharing and caring for each other, and practicing the joyful habit of spending time together. This way of life wasn’t just a one-time experiment for the early church—it was foundational. And it still is for us today.

God designed us to need each other. He created the church as a family where we can grow, lean on each other, and live out our faith together. Following Jesus is a group project, and when we live that way, we show the world a glimpse of His love and grace.

If you’re a Dallas, local, we’d love to invite you to Join us for the LO Local event on Sunday, November 17^th at 7PM at Watermark Coffee. You can come alone, and ready to make some new friends, or bring your besties. Either way, we want to help you experience biblical community (and have some fun). See you there!

The post “It’s Just Me And Jesus” Mentality Might Not Be Working first appeared on Live Original.

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Competitive by nature, I wanted to win probably more than I cared to admit. There was one problem: my stubborn self refused to wear goggles, giving my sister an obvious advantage over me. As much as I desired to win and find all the pennies, without the proper eyewear, I would just drift around picking up any blurry speck I could find.

Without the proper equipment for the game, my vision would always be impaired, impacting my ability to see clearly and participate well.

But the penny game isn’t the only area of life where seeing well matters. In our spiritual lives, we need a clear view of God to start to let Him into our lives to love us, care for us, and redeem us as His daughters. And a clear view of God starts with knowing more about who he is and what He’s like.

1. W. Tozer clearly explains these qualities, or attributes of God as things about God that are not only true, but also ones that we can know because He has revealed them to us:

“What is God like? What kind of God is He? How may we expect Him to act toward us and toward all created things? Such questions are not merely academic. They touch the far-in reaches of the human spirit, and their answers affect life and character and destiny.”

Today, I’d love to look at God’s love together.

The word love is often one that we neglect and misuse. I don’t know about you, but I’ve actually had my heart broken by people who said they really loved me. In a sense, love has been dragged through the mud at times in my life. My guess is that in one way or another, you can relate. That is why it is absolutely crucial that we understand what it means when we say God is the root and the essence of the true version of love.

One of the greatest metaphors in all of Scripture for the Father’s love is found in Luke 15. In short, a father has two sons. One son demands his inheritance. He runs away, uses it, and squanders everything he’s been given. Ashamed and downcast, he musters up enough courage to return home and try and convince his dad to at least let him back into the home, even if as a servant. Let’s pick up at the moment of his return:

But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. And the son said to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you, I am no longer worthy to be called your son.” But the father said to his servants, “Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet. And bring the fattened calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate. For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.” And they began to celebrate. (Luke 15:20–24)

So many people read this and focus only on the prodigal son. But this story is about so much more. A major theme in it is the father and how he demonstrates God’s love.

The father would have been wearing a long, heavy robe with multiple layers. Not only that, but it was seen as disgraceful for a man of status to run like we see in this parable. But this father wasn’t just any father. He was one who had abundant grace and love toward those who were his own. He deeply desired his son to return, even if the son didn’t believe his father wanted him to. This is love.

Let’s look at the end of the story when his older brother finds out the younger brother has returned.

“He was angry and refused to go in. His father came out and entreated him, but he answered his father, “Look, these many years I have served you, and I never disobeyed your command, yet you never gave me a young goat, that I might celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fattened calf for him!” And he said to him, “Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours. It was fitting to celebrate and be glad, for this your brother was dead, and is alive; he was lost, and is found.” (Luke 15:28–32)

What does this show us about God the Father’s love?

God’s love is not contingent on what we do or don’t do. For the son who returned home full of shame and regret, everything the father had was his. For the son who never departed from him, everything the father had was also his. This is the Father’s love—filled with reckless abandon for those He calls His own.

After my dad died at 15 years old to liver cancer, there was a shame that haunted me. At fifteen, I had no idea how to watch someone I love die or how to even be around him. I found myself being completely emotionally shut off toward him out of a place of deep sadness and fear of losing him. On top of all that, because I wasn’t able to make it to him in time before he went into a coma, I never got to tell him how much I loved him and that he was a good dad.

With him gone, the daunting reality that I would never get to tell him these truths caused pain in the deepest parts of my being. To the point where I didn’t know if I would be able to live the rest of my life knowing that I had blown it in his last days. The enemy attacked me hard with this lie and I lived every day in despair and regret.

About a month went by as I walked in this specific pain. One morning around that time, I woke up and found myself physically unable to get out of bed. The grief was attacking every part of my body and I had no strength to go on another day. My mom allowed me to stay home that day from school and I quickly drifted back to sleep. I woke up around noon, figured I should try and get up and eat something, and stumbled to the door. I opened the door, looked down, and saw a letter sealed with an envelope with my name on it. I immediately recognized the handwriting—my dad’s. Unknown to me that he even wrote me a letter, I was met with nerves, excitement, and fear. What will he say? Will he be disappointed in me as a daughter over how I handled the months leading up to his death? I made my way downstairs and slowly opened the letter and braced myself for whatever it might say.

The letter read: “Morgan, if you are reading this, I have died and am now in Heaven with God.” What followed shook me to my core:

I want you to know that I know how much you truly loved me.

Did I read that right? I read it again. And again. And again. Did he really just say that he knew how much I loved him? What I was expecting was for him to say that he loved me. But he knew I already knew that. What he somehow knew was what I would truly struggle with: the fear of him not knowing my love for him. In that moment, chains broke. God freed me from the one lie that I would have believed for the rest of my life.

A lie that could have broken me.
A lie that could have made me take my life.
A lie that would have held me back from freedom.

That day, just like the prodigal son and the older brother, I learned that God’s love for us will never be contingent on our performance or perfection. It was in our inability to perform or be perfect that Christ died for us.

I have heard it said that salvation is free, but surrender is costly. Will you surrender even the darkest places to the Father who is eager to pour out His goodness, immanence, and love onto you as His beloved?

All you have to do is allow the Father to love you and respond with loving Him back. When we learn to be loved, everything else will follow.

As I think back to that nostalgic summertime pool game, I like to think of those pennies as attributes of God. All around us, clear for us to see, and ready for discovering if we have the proper equipment. But instead of goggles, God pours out His Word, His Spirit, and His Son—all helping us to see the truth that He is full of love, He pours out His love, and He is love.

Morgan Krueger is a Jesus follower, wife, mother, and author who found her voice connecting with women seeking freedom from the brokenness of past shame. Her first book, Goodbye Hiding, Hello Freedom: Trading Your Shame for Redemption in Jesus, is out now. In her downtime, you can find Morgan enjoying the significance of the mundane, including spending time with her two sons, encouraging women through words and watching British baking shows with her husband, Ryan, in Franklin, TN. You can connect with her on Instagram @morganwkrueger and at morgankrueger.com.

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A couple weeks ago, I met up with a friend that I hadn’t seen in a while. One thing I admire about this friend is her love for the Lord. Every time we get together, we almost always end up in a spiritual conversation about our personal relationship with Jesus. Praise God for good, holy friends. On this day, we got on the topic of worldly versus Godly things. There’s that word again, “things,” but this time it’s used in a different context. Now the simple term has a more meaningful word in front of it: Godly. What exactly makes these things Godly and what separates them from the worldly desires we feed into now?

In the book of Colossians it says, “Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry” (Colossians 3:5, NIV). These could be examples of worldly things that not only occupy our minds but pull us away from the Lord. When we get caught up in these impure thoughts, we start to veer off the path away from His kingdom. The desires of the world are not God’s desires, and they never will be, yet it is still hard to let go of them sometimes.

Up until a couple months ago, I was very set on having some of these worldly things. A husband, children, and my dream career were at the top of that list. And while I still desire these things, I want a strong relationship with God even more. These things that I hope to have one day will only be attainable through our Lord and His plan for my life. I struggled at first to let these things go, and I can say that often the thought still enters my mind of what my future will be like. However, instead of just wanting these things, I pray for them. Lord, if it is in your will, then it will be done. I pray over my future family and the plans that He has for me. Whether those plans pan out the way I want will tell with time, but for now I fully trust in His ways.

It can be quite the challenge to avoid wanting to give in to current trends on social media and buy the most popular items being advertised. Most of us think, “well they have it, so I have to have it too.” It can also be challenging to see loved ones or friends with something we had on our wish list. There could be a sense of jealousy or lack of fairness that we feel deep down. I know it can be difficult to let go of earthly belongings but let me tell you something. YOU BELONG to God and that is more valuable than any other earthly belonging out there. We see this realization in the gospel of John with the Samaritan woman at the well.

In John 4, we read the well-known story of Jesus encountering the woman collecting water from the well. If you have never read this story, go read it. It’s powerful, moving, and will probably make you cry tears of joy, I did, that’s for sure. I have read this story many times and have even seen it portrayed on the popular Christian television show, The Chosen, however, last week in Bible study we took a deeper dive into some of the details. While there are many significant and meaningful aspects of this story, I would like to talk specifically about the final encounter the woman has with Jesus. After Jesus tells her that he is the Christ, the Son of God, she begins to head back to the town to tell all the people of the man she just engaged with. The Messiah has told “me everything I ever did” (John 4:29, NIV). But there is a small detail to this story that often gets overlooked. In verse 28, it says, “Then, leaving her water jar…” As soon as Jesus reveals himself to the women, she drops everything she needed, forgets all about her past, and immediately goes to share the amazing truth that just stood before her. Even though she had just met Jesus for the first-time minutes before, she gave up all her worldly tasks and belongings in that moment to follow God. That brings so much joy and contentment to one’s life and we can do the exact same thing today.

I’m not saying that we need to abandon all our belongings to follow the Lord. Of course, there are obvious things that we need in this lifetime, but it is important to not place them above our one, true God. In 1 John 2:15 it says, “Do not love the world or anything in the world” (NIV). If we focus on obeying God’s word and doing His will, then we are setting our mind on things from the Lord. By doing this, we are not only strengthening our relationship with Him, but we are working towards living a life with Him eternally in Heaven. One thing that will always stick with me is this; “The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever” (1 John 2:17, NIV). This is the greatest gift of all.

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Oftentimes when you want to be something or do something, you have a role model or mentor. Someone who has already become a so-called “expert” in the subject you are trying to master. You watch this person closely and hang onto their every word in hopes to find some bit of the map to your desired destination. Piece by piece, word by word, story by story you’re closer to unveiling how to accomplish this ambition. Your mind begins to expand and your heart smiles as this goal of yours is slowly becoming a reality.

Our first thought for someone who is an “expert” on strength is probably someone with immense physical strength. Like Goliath in 1 Samuel 17, a man of enormous size and physical capabilities. His physical strength was so monstrous that he terrified an entire army and kept them from battle. Yes, an entire army. And if I’m honest, this will never be my kind of strength. I am 5’7. Paralyzing an army from my sheer physical strength and stature is not in the cards for me.

The kind of strength I desire is not this physical strength demonstrated by Goliath or what we typically think of described in the first definition of strong: “having the power to move heavy weights or perform other physically demanding tasks.”^[1]

The kind of strength I desire is that of David in the Goliath story. He exemplified the second more encompassing and true definition of strength that I believe is far more valuable than just the physical, to be “able to withstand great force or pressure.” ^[2]

When every soldier in the entire army trembled in fear at Goliath’s physical strength, David revealed what it means to be truly strong. He had every pressure to back down from battle but he withstood.

Fully aware that he was just a shepherd and not a soldier, David begged to go into battle against Goliath.

Fully aware that Goliath was a GIANT, David begged to go into battle against Goliath.

Fully aware of the warnings of fellow soldiers that he was not capable of winning, David begged to go into battle against Goliath.

When I read this story, I couldn’t help but wonder how David was able to withstand. How could David be so strong when everything in this world points to just giving in?

It actually took me flying 23 hours across the country, passing out in freezing weather, and climbing the tallest free standing mountain in the world to figure this one out. So I pray and hope this streamlines your process a bit.

The 23 hour flight was to Tanzania. Tanzania is home to a 19,341 foot Goliath of a mountain called Mount Kilimanjaro. I had the incredible opportunity to hike this mountain this summer to raise awareness and funds for Compassion International, an organization committed to freeing children from poverty in Jesus’s name. And that mountain is home to the freezing weather I mentioned a bit ago. For 6 days, this mountain was my home as well.

We ate on this mountain, talked on this mountain, laughed on this mountain, slept on this mountain, and yes…. went to the bathroom on this mountain. But more importantly, we hiked on this mountain.. for hours and hours. The first four days were honestly bliss. All my months of training for this trek had paid off. On the fourth night you wake up at midnight to climb the remaining 4000 feet to the top of the mountain. You eat breakfast in the pitch black with only stars and the moon illuminating the sky and begin your summit to the top.

Staring up at the stars, in the 9 degree weather, I looked up to the heavens and told God “this is one of the best days of my life”. I danced for the next 2-3 hours as I walked step by step up the mountain until something funny happened. I began to feel lightheaded. And then I would pass out. As I am climbing up rocks and in the snow, I begin to pass out for 1-2 seconds at a time and catch myself just before I hit the ground with my handy hiking poles.

Long story short, I did this for the next 2 hours of the hike. All my months of training never prepared me for this moment. My physical strength was gone. My mental strength diminished every time I passed out. I was not strong like David. The very real pressures of this circumstance were weighing on me like I had never experienced weight before and I was entirely too weak to withstand.

I started to pray and ask the Lord for strength because I no longer had it. I was absolutely desperate. And in my desperation, the Lord reminded me of the lyrics of the first song I ever sang in Church “I am weak but thou art strong”.

Step by step. I hiked this mountain for 6 more hours singing this song to myself.

“I am weak but thou art strong.”

And step by step. The Lord gave me strength. Strength to withstand the pressures and summit Mount Kilimanjaro.

I realize that this is how David did it. This is how David withstood the pressures and entered battle. This is how David slayed Goliath. This is how David was made strong.

By first recognizing He is weak but thou art strong.

He didn’t have the strength, but He walked with a God that did.

As I have been home I’ve faced days where the pressure feels like it’s coming from every side. And instead of trying to find the courage, I just simply surrender to God and say “I am weak, but thou art strong.” I put God back on the throne of my heart, I make Him the source of my strength, and humble myself that I am not strong.

And then I walk with the one that is. Just like David did. The song I sang on the mountain is actually a hymn called “just a closer walk with Thee”. How beautiful? I don’t have to muster up the strength, I simply need to walk closer to thee.

You don’t have to muster up the strength. Simply surrender. Say “God I am weak, but thou art strong.” And then walk with the one that is.

Remember how earlier I mentioned finding an expert, role model, or mentor? Jesus is that. He is my expert, role model, and mentor. He walked this earth and exemplified to us perfectly how to walk with thee. How to be strong amidst the pressures of this world. And He is so much more. He is the source of this very strength and life I desire.

I’ve learned that if I want to walk with thee, I need to study the one that did so perfectly. And you know what’s beautiful? As I study and read about Jesus’s life, pray, and surrender this crazy thing happens:

Piece by piece, word by word, story by story I’m becoming stronger although I am weak. My mind is expanding and my heart is smiling. Perhaps even doing a dance. And this goal of being strong, through Jesus has become a reality.

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13

And through Christ, it can be your reality too.

Maia Mae Huff is passionate about spreading love, truth, and light to all people. Whether that be through phone calls with a friend, her In This Together podcast, speaking, or any way that God leads.

Keep up with Maia Mae Huff on Instagram @maiamaehuff

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In August of 2021, before I was in college, I sat down for coffee with a mentor who had recently graduated. She told me that being a Christian in college is lonely. In that moment, that made sense – because I already knew that college culture is not aligned with following Jesus. I would actually say it is almost the opposite of Christianity as it is filled with drugs, alcohol, gossip and sexual immorality. So even though I understood it, I didn’t realize how much that comment would impact my first year and a half of college. As crazy as it sounds now, that comment – that being a Christian in college is lonely – would lead me to partly suppress my relationship with Jesus for my first year and a half at Penn. 

I started my freshman year of college as a student-athlete for the fall season. So in my first few months, because of my sport, I wasn’t really exposed to the true “college culture”. But when my season ended in November, I was fully immersed in what I was sheltered from during the season. 

I had grown up as a Christian in New Jersey where I felt lonely in my faith. High school was hard. Seeing things differently than other people seemed to lead to fewer and fewer friendships. Because of that, I was determined to have a different experience in college. 

This desire led me to jump right into the college scene that I was surrounded by in hopes of somehow being fulfilled by it. I hoped the excitement of a night out would tame my anxiety, but I’d wake up the next day 10 times more anxious. I wanted the friendships I was building to mold me into a joyful person, but the gossip that stemmed from them left me empty. Yet I was still determined to make it work – I thought I craved the nights out that were full of excitement and potential, but how momentary those were. People were my “friends” on those nights, but were strangers to me the next day. It was all built on sand, and as soon as the wind blew I was left with practically nothing. A friendship cannot last if it is built on gossip and bitterness. As a matter of fact, nothing can last when it is built on a foundation other than Jesus.

“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.”

Matthew 7:24-27

This whole time I had been running from the idea of being lonely in college that I was warned about. I’ve now come to realize the loneliness my mentor was referring to is a worldly definition of lonely. Oxford Languages says lonely means “sad because one has no friends or company”. And yes, that is what I was running from – I wanted friends and company. I wanted the college memories you always hear about. But worldly friends and company leads you to true loneliness – without a deep relationship with the Creator of the universe and the One who knit me together in my mother’s womb. Without a relationship with Jesus, I am truly lonely. And no, I didn’t completely abandon my faith but I did not have a great relationship with Him. It is one thing to be a believer, but it’s another to be in a deeply rooted relationship with Jesus. 

Halfway through my sophomore year, I stopped trying to fit in. I no longer desired to be a part of the life that everyone else was living and that I once tried to live. I had seen and experienced the brokenness and heartache that everything brought. And yes, it was hard. By worldly standards did I feel lonely? Yes. But the fulfillment and peace within my heart proved to me that I was actually surrounded. I was surrounded by my Father. And in the end, that is all our souls are ever searching for. When we are surrounded by the God of the Universe, we aren’t searching for things to fill our void anymore because that void is gone. Jesus fulfills the eternal void in your heart with His eternal and steadfast love and presence.

And when we follow God, the worldly loneliness does not last. God knows what we need – He knows we can’t and are not meant to live a life following Him by ourselves. 

“And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”

Hebrews 10:24-25

After I decided to live a life for Jesus, even where I may be one of few, I have seen a community emerge that only God can create. Whether it is through Bible studies at Penn, working at Live Original and new friends, it is all just a testament of God’s goodness. 

As I am writing this, the song “So Will I (100 Billion X)” by Hillsong is playing. One of the lyrics says “You’re the One who never leaves the one behind”. That verse is such a perfect example of God in this context. My first year and a half at college, God was fervently running after me, and He still is: It didn’t end once He did get me. He then brought me back to the rest of His people. He will not leave you to be by yourself. 

If you are going through anything like this, let me tell you – it will not be easy, and God never promised it would be. It wasn’t even close to easy for Jesus. But what’s harder is running after something that will never fulfill you no matter how hard you try, no matter how much you want it to. 

I pray that through reading this you feel encouraged to follow the true desire of your heart! Love you all!

Keep up with Lily on Instagram @lilyakumar

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” ‭‭John‬ ‭16‬:‭33‬ 

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” ‭‭Joshua‬ ‭1‬:‭9‬

The post A Light In Dark Places first appeared on Live Original.

Think of this idea as a painting. We may spend hours staring at a painting, constantly looking it over and still, we are unable to grasp the painter’s intention. We might even wonder why on earth someone would paint something like that. Now, let’s say we are staring at a painting and the original painter is right beside us. We might be able to see their vision for the painting while getting to hear the purpose behind it— their desire for their design. Now isn’t it true that it’s far easier to know someone’s desire for their design when they are close to us? A close friend will know your heart behind a tough decision, over someone who watches your life from the internet. Someone who has seen you at your worst will be able to fully celebrate you at your best, over someone who hasn’t seen how hard you’ve fought. Moms have a sixth sense when it comes to knowing what their babies need because of how close their bond is. So what if as Christians, as we spend time with God who is the one true designer, we might start to understand the beauty of His desire a little better? And if the designer is God, then you my dear friend, are a product of his ultimate desire.

We may never know why things take the shapes they do, or why people in certain circles have it harder than others. One does not tell the mountains how they should look, nor does someone tell the ocean how to behave. So we may never know the purpose in the details of our design. However, I will say that the more we spend time with our designer, the more our desires will eventually come into alignment with his design. We don’t have to be the designer, but our desire can grow for what God has designed. In the Old Testament, the prophet Isaiah said,

“Yes, Lord, walking in the ways of your laws, we wait for you; your name and renown are the desire of our hearts. My soul yearns for you in the night; in the morning my spirit longs for you…” (Isaiah 26:8-9).

One of the ways our desire grows is by walking in close proximity with God. There were times when the Israelites walked close to God and they followed his laws, they obeyed his commands and they were walking in his presence daily. God had a desire to be near to them and they had a desire to be near to Him. Then there were other times when the Israelites waited on God. They waited for him to come through, they waited for his promises, they waited for him to tell them which ways to go and yet they did this in close proximity to God. Now like any journey with God, there are times when we fall off. We tend to go our own way and we often think that what we know is better than what God knows. But at the end of the day, our heart’s desire is for God. When we go off on our own, there is still something inside of us that’s searching for meaning greater than ourselves. Therefore, God’s design is supposed to be our greatest desire.

The more we get to know our Creator, the more we get to see how truly beautiful His design for His creation is. When we sit with him in the mornings, we are met with his presence before anything else has a chance to sway our desires. When we pray to God for answers before turning to other people, we give him the space to share with us his design. When we are questioning life and the path that we must take, the very one who designed our path is waiting to tell us where to go. Again, we don’t have to understand God’s design, but the more time you spend with him, the more you will understand his desire. And spoiler alert, you are God’s ultimate design and the product of his greatest desire.

If he is the designer and you are his masterpiece then he sees underneath the mess, underneath the smudges, behind the layers and into the depths of the darkest paint in your life. He painted it! He designed you, He formed you in the secret place and He loved you completely before you ever achieved a single thing! Now your life might feel bleak, hopeless, worn out, tired and stuck, but there’s a designer who’s in the business of making his design into something beautiful. Friends, the more time you spend with your designer, I pray the more you will experience the desire he has for you. And my goodness is it ever beautiful.

So may his design, become your greatest desire.

The post God’s Design Over My Desire first appeared on Live Original.

I’ve had the opportunity to talk to a lot of women and a few men about the end of their marriage. The first thing I usually start with is, “Tell me about your support system.” It seems like a broad area to initially ask about. Most people expect me to ask more about what ended the marriage or where they are in the divorce process or how the kids are doing.

But the reality is, outside of their relationship with God, a support system is vital in hope and healing. Isolation can be detrimental. And trust me, I’ve done both. I’ve cut off communication and detached because the pain was too great. I secluded myself due to the embarrassment of failure. Coming out of feeling verbally and mentally abused in a relationship takes a lot of relearning. Relearning how to share the reality, relearning how to trust your intuition, relearning how to be vulnerable, relearning what it feels like to feel safe with another person.

For me, leaning in to my community took work. It took vulnerability, and in some cases, it took repair. It’s difficult to lean on community during heartbreak, to trust anyone when your heart literally feels like it is crushed from broken trust. A life of connection and community is risky; however, a life lived in isolation is an even greater risk.

There will be people in your life who will hold your story and people who will hear your story. The people who hold your story are the ones who walk with you through the darkest days. They possibly feel your story is a part of their story.

I remember when my best friend’s husband, Jud, described what Lori experienced when she’d hang up the phone with me. Keep in mind we live two thousand miles apart, and she would call every day. She would say she knew how I was doing based on hearing my voice. Jud said she’d hang up the phone with me and walk straight to his office, lay her head in his lap, and just sob. Her heart broke for me because she was holding my story. My story became part of her story.

Maybe you are that support system for the person walking through divorce. Here are a few thoughts. We often ask the hurting person, “What do you need?” or “What can I do for you?” or a few other versions of that inquiry, offering authentic help. Here’s the catch. A person in trauma doesn’t know what they need. So when asked, “What do you need?” they don’t know. They don’t have an answer. They can’t articulate what they need. And honestly, what they do need, you probably can’t give them.

Give them options. For instance, you can give specific offers like, “What do you need today? I can come to your house and cook dinner. We can go out for dinner. Or you can come to our house and I’ll cook.”

Options allow the person in trauma the ability to make a decision and not feel overwhelmed. It helps them to articulate what they need at that time. It helps ground them to feel like they have some control over what is going on around them. When offering help, it’s a minor tweak that makes a huge difference.

This played out in my life at sporting events. Showing up alone to events for your kids can be really difficult. You’re self-conscious, you’re alone, trying to figure out where to sit, who to sit with, and all the while wanting to keep a smile on your face for your kids when your heart is broken.

I went from sitting with multiple family members to being alone. It’s hard.

Then this group of five ladies drifted into my life. Our kids had played football together since sixth grade. We’d all been acquaintances since 2014, but something about the football season seven years ago glued us together. They saw I was hurting, and they stepped in. I’m not even sure how we all connected, but they became a lifeline for me in so many ways.

Each gameday I’d get a text from one of them or sometimes several of them. The text gave me options. For instance, “Want to meet at the tailgate or want to meet in the stands?” If it was an away game, it would sound more like, “Want us to pick you up, or do you want to meet us at the tailgate?” I didn’t even realize at the time how beneficial the options were in allowing me to choose what I was most comfortable with.

I never would have asked for help navigating Friday nights; it just wouldn’t have been my nature. They just stepped in and created community every Friday night. Trust me when I say, Friday night games are just one of the many ways these five lovely ladies have shown up for me over the last seven years.

We’re now “The Six Pack” because there are six of us, not because of our killer abdominal game—there are way too many kids between us for that.

Then there are the friendships that feel like they have always existed. The weekend before mediation for my divorce, I flew to meet two of my best friends, Lori Wilhite and Lisa Hughes, and their husbands. These are the two friends who dropped everything and surprised me by flying to Nashville and spending a few nights and days with me on what would have been my twentieth wedding anniversary.

These are the two friends who, over a ten-hour uninterrupted period and lots of Diet Coke, listened to me recount my twenty years of marriage and all the times I felt trust had been shattered, beginning in year one and working chronologically through the relationship. These are the type of friends who, when I gave permission for them to “talk behind my back” (because I grew tired of repeating the details of daily life), responded with, “We already do.” And there was never a concern that they were gossiping about me. I knew any conversation they were having “behind my back” was out of genuine concern and love.

I knew that my heart and my head needed the encouragement, positive feedback, and validation from healthy men who stood on stages and shared the hope of God. Trust me, it isn’t lost on me that God placed two friends in my life who are married to pastors, men who held very similar positions to my ex-husband. Their willingness to be with me before the one big day that signified the end of the last twenty years—that’s friendship.

These types of friendships bring to mind this story from Exodus 17. Joshua had led the Israelites into battle against the Amalekites, just as Moses had ordered. While Joshua was on the ground fighting, Moses, along with Aaron and Hur, climbed on top of a nearby mountain. While Joshua led the charge on the ground, Moses lifted his hands in prayer to God. While Moses’s hands were raised, the Israelites were winning. If his arms lowered out of fatigue, the Amalekites prevailed. The combat lasted for hours, and this is where the story gets good.

So Joshua did what Moses had commanded and fought the army of Amalek. Meanwhile, Moses, Aaron, and Hur climbed to the top of a nearby hill. As long as Moses held up the staff in his hand, the Israelites had the advantage. But whenever he dropped his hand, the Amalekites gained the advantage. Moses’ arms soon became so tired he could no longer hold them up. So Aaron and Hur found a stone for him to sit on. Then they stood on each side of Moses, holding up his hands. So his hands held steady until sunset. As a result, Joshua overwhelmed the army of Amalek in battle.

Exodus 17:10–13

Moses could only continue his intercession because of his support system. Aaron and Hur literally held up his arms so he could continue fighting the battle in prayer. We are left with no other option than to believe that if Aaron and Hur hadn’t stepped in so Moses could continue to fight the battle with prayer, the Israelites would have been defeated by the Amalekites.

And don’t overlook what jumps out in this story. God is the provider of victory when we are attacked. Our attackers might not be armor-wearing, sword-wielding soldiers. The battles may be with familiar faces and well-aimed verbal blows. God is the provider of victory. God is also the provider of friends to literally hold up our arms when we can’t anymore. As women, we are often in the arm-holding business. We support and hold up arms all around us, from our children to coworkers to church friends to neighbors.

This passage in Exodus invites these questions: Who is holding up your arms? Who is joining you in your pain, struggle, hurt, and weariness? Who is grabbing hold of your exhausted hands and helping to lift them to the Lord? You might be asking how to find these people in your life. Let me share a few characteristics that point to a safe friendship. And if you don’t have a friend like this, ask God to bring you the friendship you need.

1. They help you become a better version of yourself.

2. They nurture your talents and abilities.

3. They help connect you with other safe people.

4. They help you develop your spiritual growth.

5. They celebrate your accomplishments and cheer for you.

6. You can put your guard down with them.

7. Vulnerability is welcomed between you.

Article adapted from Better Than Okay: Finding Hope and Healing After Your Marriage Ends by Brandi Wilson (copyright 2023, published by Bethany House / Baker Publishing Group)

Brandi Wilson is a coach and speaker who has been in leadership for more than a decade at Leading and Loving It, a non-profit created to empower women to love life and ministry. Brandi has helped plant two churches and is passionate about walking alongside single moms and divorced women as they navigate parenting and life. Her latest book is Better Than Okay: Finding Hope and Healing After Your Marriage Ends. Brandi lives with her three sons in Nashville, TN. www.LoveBrandiWilson.com

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