For others, this year may mark a “first” that feels anything but joyful: first year without “them”, first year with the diagnosis, first year alone. And for others, it may not be a “first”, but this holiday season carries a heaviness that can’t quite be put into words, even if you tried.

Did you know that the word “holiday” comes from an Old English words meaning “holy day?” I believe this is so important because when we first think of the holiday season, it’s so easy to measure it on the scale of whether it’s going to be a “good” “bad” or “hard” holiday season. But what if the origin of this word opens up so much more meaning of the holidays for each of us, no matter what season we find ourselves in?

What if we asked Jesus, the author of our stories, the following questions as we kick off the seasons festivites:

Lord, what does clinging to your holiness in the brokenness look like this holiday season?
Jesus, how can I bring your sacred presence into my home, even if my family can’t get along?
God, what areas of my life am I not leaning on your holy presence?

My prayer for you, is that you would see these holy moments found in God’s presence all around you this holiday season. Not in spite of what you are carrying this year, but through it.

I pray that the “God of all comfort who comforts us in all our affliction” (2 Cor. 1:3-4) will draw near to you this year, nearer than you ever knew possible.

I pray that if you’re in the valley, Jesus would wrap his arms around you through His presence, His word, and His people. And if you are the friend walking alongside someone in the valley, that you would comfort them just as you have been comforted through the power of prayer and presence.

If I’ve learned anything, it’s that we as humans need two fundamental things in life: We need God and we need each other 🤍

Let’s be people who seek help when we needed this year and also be those who keep our eyes open for those who may need a smile, a hug, and prayer.

Happy Holy Days, friends 🫶🏼

The post A Note for the Holiday Season first appeared on Live Original.

Competitive by nature, I wanted to win probably more than I cared to admit. There was one problem: my stubborn self refused to wear goggles, giving my sister an obvious advantage over me. As much as I desired to win and find all the pennies, without the proper eyewear, I would just drift around picking up any blurry speck I could find.

Without the proper equipment for the game, my vision would always be impaired, impacting my ability to see clearly and participate well.

But the penny game isn’t the only area of life where seeing well matters. In our spiritual lives, we need a clear view of God to start to let Him into our lives to love us, care for us, and redeem us as His daughters. And a clear view of God starts with knowing more about who he is and what He’s like.

1. W. Tozer clearly explains these qualities, or attributes of God as things about God that are not only true, but also ones that we can know because He has revealed them to us:

“What is God like? What kind of God is He? How may we expect Him to act toward us and toward all created things? Such questions are not merely academic. They touch the far-in reaches of the human spirit, and their answers affect life and character and destiny.”

Today, I’d love to look at God’s love together.

The word love is often one that we neglect and misuse. I don’t know about you, but I’ve actually had my heart broken by people who said they really loved me. In a sense, love has been dragged through the mud at times in my life. My guess is that in one way or another, you can relate. That is why it is absolutely crucial that we understand what it means when we say God is the root and the essence of the true version of love.

One of the greatest metaphors in all of Scripture for the Father’s love is found in Luke 15. In short, a father has two sons. One son demands his inheritance. He runs away, uses it, and squanders everything he’s been given. Ashamed and downcast, he musters up enough courage to return home and try and convince his dad to at least let him back into the home, even if as a servant. Let’s pick up at the moment of his return:

But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. And the son said to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you, I am no longer worthy to be called your son.” But the father said to his servants, “Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet. And bring the fattened calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate. For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.” And they began to celebrate. (Luke 15:20–24)

So many people read this and focus only on the prodigal son. But this story is about so much more. A major theme in it is the father and how he demonstrates God’s love.

The father would have been wearing a long, heavy robe with multiple layers. Not only that, but it was seen as disgraceful for a man of status to run like we see in this parable. But this father wasn’t just any father. He was one who had abundant grace and love toward those who were his own. He deeply desired his son to return, even if the son didn’t believe his father wanted him to. This is love.

Let’s look at the end of the story when his older brother finds out the younger brother has returned.

“He was angry and refused to go in. His father came out and entreated him, but he answered his father, “Look, these many years I have served you, and I never disobeyed your command, yet you never gave me a young goat, that I might celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fattened calf for him!” And he said to him, “Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours. It was fitting to celebrate and be glad, for this your brother was dead, and is alive; he was lost, and is found.” (Luke 15:28–32)

What does this show us about God the Father’s love?

God’s love is not contingent on what we do or don’t do. For the son who returned home full of shame and regret, everything the father had was his. For the son who never departed from him, everything the father had was also his. This is the Father’s love—filled with reckless abandon for those He calls His own.

After my dad died at 15 years old to liver cancer, there was a shame that haunted me. At fifteen, I had no idea how to watch someone I love die or how to even be around him. I found myself being completely emotionally shut off toward him out of a place of deep sadness and fear of losing him. On top of all that, because I wasn’t able to make it to him in time before he went into a coma, I never got to tell him how much I loved him and that he was a good dad.

With him gone, the daunting reality that I would never get to tell him these truths caused pain in the deepest parts of my being. To the point where I didn’t know if I would be able to live the rest of my life knowing that I had blown it in his last days. The enemy attacked me hard with this lie and I lived every day in despair and regret.

About a month went by as I walked in this specific pain. One morning around that time, I woke up and found myself physically unable to get out of bed. The grief was attacking every part of my body and I had no strength to go on another day. My mom allowed me to stay home that day from school and I quickly drifted back to sleep. I woke up around noon, figured I should try and get up and eat something, and stumbled to the door. I opened the door, looked down, and saw a letter sealed with an envelope with my name on it. I immediately recognized the handwriting—my dad’s. Unknown to me that he even wrote me a letter, I was met with nerves, excitement, and fear. What will he say? Will he be disappointed in me as a daughter over how I handled the months leading up to his death? I made my way downstairs and slowly opened the letter and braced myself for whatever it might say.

The letter read: “Morgan, if you are reading this, I have died and am now in Heaven with God.” What followed shook me to my core:

I want you to know that I know how much you truly loved me.

Did I read that right? I read it again. And again. And again. Did he really just say that he knew how much I loved him? What I was expecting was for him to say that he loved me. But he knew I already knew that. What he somehow knew was what I would truly struggle with: the fear of him not knowing my love for him. In that moment, chains broke. God freed me from the one lie that I would have believed for the rest of my life.

A lie that could have broken me.
A lie that could have made me take my life.
A lie that would have held me back from freedom.

That day, just like the prodigal son and the older brother, I learned that God’s love for us will never be contingent on our performance or perfection. It was in our inability to perform or be perfect that Christ died for us.

I have heard it said that salvation is free, but surrender is costly. Will you surrender even the darkest places to the Father who is eager to pour out His goodness, immanence, and love onto you as His beloved?

All you have to do is allow the Father to love you and respond with loving Him back. When we learn to be loved, everything else will follow.

As I think back to that nostalgic summertime pool game, I like to think of those pennies as attributes of God. All around us, clear for us to see, and ready for discovering if we have the proper equipment. But instead of goggles, God pours out His Word, His Spirit, and His Son—all helping us to see the truth that He is full of love, He pours out His love, and He is love.

Morgan Krueger is a Jesus follower, wife, mother, and author who found her voice connecting with women seeking freedom from the brokenness of past shame. Her first book, Goodbye Hiding, Hello Freedom: Trading Your Shame for Redemption in Jesus, is out now. In her downtime, you can find Morgan enjoying the significance of the mundane, including spending time with her two sons, encouraging women through words and watching British baking shows with her husband, Ryan, in Franklin, TN. You can connect with her on Instagram @morganwkrueger and at morgankrueger.com.

The post A Father’s Love Letter first appeared on Live Original.

Jesus loves me, this I know,

for the Bible tells me so.

Little ones to him belong;

They are weak, but He is strong.

I can still hear my Sunday school class sing this song all together. I sang with such confidence that it was true. I just loved it, and I loved the lyrics. I mean, who doesn’t love being loved? I sure do. I’m guessing you do, too. We all have this desire to be seen, known, and loved.

As we get older and experience more life, opening ourselves up to love can feel absolutely terrifying over time. As Tim Keller explains, “To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God. It is what we need more than anything.”

Although I didn’t fully grasp how true these lyrics were at five years old in my Sunday school class, I understand now that the Bible actually does tell us so. The Word of God is full of Jesus’ love for us. And we discover the depth of love Jesus has for us, only then can we begin to open ourselves up to being known and loved by another human being. Jesus first, relationships second. Always.

In John 4, we meet a sweet friend who was looking for water, but needing so much more. We don’t know her name, but we learn a lot about her and Jesus from this conversation surrounding a water source:

A woman from Samaria came to draw water. Jesus said to her, “Give me a drink.” (For his disciples had gone away into the city to buy food.) The Samaritan woman said to him, “How is it that you, a Jew, ask for a drink from me, a woman of Samaria?” (For the Jews had no dealings with Samaritans.) Jesus answered her, “If you know the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water.” (John 4:7–10)

That’s only the beginning of her interaction with Jesus. I encourage you to read the rest of her beautiful story in John 4:11–30. But here’s what we learn about her from her time with Jesus.

She was culturally seen as “lesser than” because she was a Samaritan. Being one meant that she was generally hated by Jews for religious and racial reasons. On top of that, Samaritans were known for having unstable theological beliefs, not fully rooted in Scripture. All of this is the perfect storm for prejudice and cultural tension between these two people groups.

Also, she struggled with shame and isolation. We see in verse six that she came at the “sixth hour,” meaning around noon. Culturally, women would travel in groups in the early morning hours (the coolest time of the day) to draw water from the well. But our friend not only showed up at the hottest hour of the day, but she also came alone.

When we feel shame, we pull away from God and from others. Isolation is one of the biggest tools the enemy uses to keep us in our thought patterns of shame, guilt, and regret. That’s where we find her. That’s right where Jesus found her. And He had something to say about it.

Lastly, she had a questionable past when it came to relationships. “The woman answered him, ‘I have no husband.’ Jesus said to her, ‘You are right in saying, “I have no husband” for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true’” (John 4:17–18).

When we’re not rooted in Jesus, we have no idea what to look for. Our friend here had men give her attention, maybe even fulfill certain desires that she had (to be loved, to be taken care of, to be seen), but she was never truly satisfied because no man could ever give her what she truly longed for. She was looking for a love that stayed. A love that wasn’t based on emotions and feelings but on commitment and Christ. She was looking for living water. And although she hadn’t yet found it, the Living Water found her.

Here’s what we learn about Jesus.

Jesus will take the unlikely path to pursue you. Because of the cultural hostility that the Jews had toward Samaritans, Jewish people typically didn’t travel through Samaria when going from Judea to Galilee. Culturally, the hate was so real that they took the long route just to avoid the entire town. The tension was also real. But see here that Jesus didn’t take the path most others took. Instead, verse 4 says, “And he had to pass through Samaria.” This was a “had to” not out of a place of obligation or expectation but out of necessity to reach her.

Jesus will take any route He needs to take to get to your heart and your hurts. Not only did He take the unlikely route here, but He also waited for her. We see here that Jesus is willing, able, and eager to wait for us. Just like He was with this woman, He’s abundantly patient and never late for an encounter with His children.

Next, Jesus will break any barrier to pursue you. In that day, it’s important that we understand the role that women played in society. They were seen as the lowest class. On top of being not just a Samaritan, but a Samaritan woman, sister-friend didn’t have a whole lot going for her. But we see here that Jesus wasn’t too concerned with cultural barriers when it came to pursuing those He was after.

“Jesus said to her, ‘Give me a drink’” (John 4:7). Not only did Jesus speak to her, but He humbled Himself to ask her for something. He knew they were going to have a hard conversation, and He wanted her to know that she had a Savior that wasn’t afraid to get on her level and meet her where she was.

Lastly, Jesus will enter into your mess to pursue you. Are there parts of your life that just feel messy? Unhinged? Falling apart? Me, too. Same for our friend here. She had parts of her life that she would probably do anything to hide. But Jesus wasn’t afraid of those areas. On the contrary, those were the exact areas He was excited to dig into with her.

I’m not proud of this, but I’m a pretty messy person by nature. I remember when Ryan and I were engaged, so many people would warn me that living with a boy is messy and that I better prepare myself. I rarely commented back, but I always remember thinking, Actually, I feel bad for Ryan that he has to live with me. Yes, I am the messy one in our marriage.

One of the main messes that I make is what I like to call “my piles.” If you are a pile maker, you know what these are. They are piles of clothes. After trying on multiple outfits a day, I will form a pile in a corner of our room instead of hanging those clothes up. It’s become a running joke because if Ryan sees a pile, he can’t understand how it could be anything but dirty clothes. But with lots of patience, I explain to him that there is a difference between a clean pile and a dirty pile. In fact, most of my piles are clean! Men, right?! Just kidding! It’s a real problem, and I’m working on it 😉

I think sometimes we also compartmentalize the messy part of our lives. We have the “not so bad piles,” the “dirty piles,” and even the “looks clean on the outside piles.” But at the end of the day, a pile is a pile. And Jesus came to enter into our piles, no matter how dirty or put together they may seem. If something isn’t where He calls it to be, He will enter in and address it—even the piles we’re afraid for anyone to see.

That’s what He did here with our friend at the well. He wasn’t afraid to have the hard conversations about her relationships. He addressed the reality of her past without judgment or heaping shame onto her. Just like her pile of past broken relationships, we each have hard areas that Jesus is sitting, waiting, and ready to be welcomed in.

Friend, Jesus will never enter a situation that He doesn’t fully plan to redeem. His pursuit always has purpose. Let Him into the hard piles, the messy piles, and even the piles you’ve come to accept, and watch what He’ll do. This is the best kind of loved. Fully seen, fully known, fully loved.

Morgan Krueger is a Jesus follower, wife, mother, and author who found her voice connecting with women seeking freedom from the brokenness of past shame. Passionate about the redemption found in following Jesus, Morgan aims to keep that at the center of all she does. Morgan works at Faithfully Restored, a ministry that offers the hope of Jesus in the midst of suffering. Her first book, Goodbye Hiding, Hello Freedom: Trading Your Shame for Redemption in Jesus, releases in September 2024.

In her downtime, you can find Morgan enjoying the significance of the mundane, including spending time with her two sons, encouraging women through words, and watching British baking shows with her husband, Ryan, in Franklin, TN. You can connect with her on Instagram @morganwkrueger and at morgankrueger.com.

The post His Pursuit Always Has Purpose first appeared on Live Original.

As I’m not above any of it, I am proud to say that in the Krueger household, our humble 7-foot artificial tree that Ryan and I have had since our first year of marriage is always up before we head out of town for Thanksgiving. Yes, we are those people. If you don’t like it, I hope we can look past our differences in the name of all that is merry and bright. Regardless of who you are, I think we can agree that, for one reason or another, we all love Christmas.

What’s not to love? The lights, the trees, the shows, the food, the parties, the gifts, the music, the movies, the fellowship. The list goes on and on, just like our amazon wish lists. And who doesn’t love their friend’s annual Christmas cookie party?

Beyond all of the festive hype of Christmas, I believe there’s a desperation for the holiday season that goes deeper than just gifts and lights. It’s an eagerness of soul, a longing, and an anticipation that there might just be something fulfilled that our hearts search for during this time.

2,000+ years ago, before Christmas lights and caroling even existed, the origin of why we celebrate centered around only one thing: a desperation for the coming King. It’s the heart of advent, which literally translates “arrival” or “coming”.

On the night of Jesus’ birth, a heavenly host of angels gloriously broke onto the scene before an unlikely group of people that we read about in Luke 2:8-20:

“And in the same region there were shepherds out in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And an angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were filled with great fear. And the angel said to them, “Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. And this will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger.” And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, “Glory to Go in the highest, and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!”

When the angels went away from them into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let us go over to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has made known to us.” And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby lying in a manger. And when they saw it, they made known the saying that had been told them concerning this child. And all who heard it wondered at what the shepherds told them. But Mary treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart. And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen, as it had been told them.”

Have you ever thought about the fact that Jesus, being God incarnate, was fully sovereign and in control over every detail of His birth?

In February of this year, Ryan and I welcomed our first child, a son, into this world. Our baby, Graham, was a beautiful picture of the faithfulness of God in our lives and we couldn’t wait to tell those we loved that he was finally here. But there was an order to his birth announcement. We started with our immediate family, then extended family, then close friends, then other good friends, and then finally made an announcement on social media. We think Graham is pretty great, but not so great that he would have the ability to control the news of his arrival or any other detail of his birth for that matter. But the baby in a manger, Jesus, actually did have full control over His.

Jesus, the long-awaited savior-King, could have sent the angels to ANYONE to give the good news of great joy. And who did He send them to first? The shepherds.

At that time, shepherds were regarded at the very bottom of the Palestinian social ladder, right there with the tax collectors and those who cleaned up literal waste. They held a reputation of “incompetence”, to the point where it was stated that if one were to a fall into a pit, no one should feel obligated to pull them out. Sheesh. Talk about a tough go.

But in Jesus’ upside-down Kingdom, they were the perfect audience to receive the invitation to first behold His glory.

So why the shepherds? Jesus wanted to start his life the same way that he would end it – by coming to seek and save that which is lost (Luke 19:10).

The shepherds had nothing in their own merit or reputation to cling to. They knew they were depraved. They were okay to show their need. And because of that, they weren’t afraid to be desperate for that which could save, redeem, free, and heal.

Just as there are two types of people during the holiday season, they are also two types of people in the gospel story, both in which need saving: those who know it and those who don’t.

When it comes to the birth of Jesus, we will never care about it unless we see that we are those in which He came for. We are those that need saving this Christmas. Not just for the neighbor that drives you crazy. Not just for the friend that has hurt you. Not just for the significant other that you wish put you first more. Jesus came for me. Jesus came for you. We are the people who desperately need saving this year.

So, when the shepherds heard of the Good News, what did they do? They responded in their desperation. Luke’s account of the story tells us that they responded with “Let us now go”and then they “went with haste”.

After years of longing for a Savior, the silence was broken on this dark night in Bethlehem. And the shepherds traveled far and wide not for worldly gain, but for just a glimpse of Emmanuel – God with us.

The posture of the shepherds thousands of years ago shows us what the advent season is supposed to stir in us today: an awareness of our need for saving, and an awakened desperation for the presence of our Savior.

So my question is this: Are we as desperate for Jesus as we are for the Christmas parties, the presents, and another year of our favorite holiday traditions?

I don’t know about you, but for me, I could easily fill this month with some of the best things: friends, family, gift giving, volunteer opportunities, Christmas Eve services, advent devotionals, lights, hot cocoa, celebrating my baby’s first Christmas, photo ops, Christmas cards, extra rest, you name it….. and I could still miss it. I could miss the wonder, the awe, the haste, the urgency, the longing, and the desperation for the origin of the Christmas story: Jesus. Let’s not miss it this year.

This advent season, let us see ourselves as shepherds, full of lack and with nothing to boast in but Christ. Let us remember the goodness of God in the past to send us His son to be born, live the perfect life we could never live, and to die a death that we deserved… all to set us free from sin and death. And let us look ahead to the promise that one day He will return and bring it all to peace.

He will right every wrong.

He will heal every sickness.

He will wipe every tear.

He will welcome every outcast.

He will free everyone stuck in shame.

He will redeem all brokenness.

I pray it’s such a wonderful holiday season for you. I pray you laugh, drink all the hot cocoa, see all the lights, watch all the classic movies, attend all the festive parties, kiss under the mistletoe, and soak in all the music, fellowship, and chats around the fire. But above all, I pray you and I experience Jesus in a renewed way this year. I pray we would crave His presence. I pray we would cling to His word. I pray that we would look to Him as our ultimate comfort and our true reason for the season.

Let’s be desperate together for true Christmas this year. Let’s be desperate for Jesus.

Morgan Krueger is a wife, mother, and an encourager at heart. She loves all things Fall, talks around a fire, and teaching/learning what it looks like to follow Jesus. Having been on team LO, she will always have a “young & scrappy” mentality when it comes to life, ministry, & sisterhood and is so grateful for any opportunity to come back & encourage sisters and friends. You can read more from Morgan on Instagram @morganwkrueger 🙂

The post Desperate for Christmas first appeared on Live Original.

Let’s talk about what it means to be whole. 

This is a topic that is so close to my heart because anything I share today is such a personal part of my story. Things God is teaching me. Things God is ironing out in my life right now. And I want to invite you today to join me in a deep hunger to live a wholehearted life for God.

I want you to close your eyes. Clear your mind. Think back to a time, maybe it was yesterday, last week, five years ago, when you were five, but think about a time you truly felt alive. A time you felt wholehearted. Don’t overcomplicate it. Think about where you were. Think about who you were with. What were you doing? What were you thinking about? What were you NOT thinking about? What were you not worried or anxious about that you might be struggling with now? How present were you?

Now open your eyes.

Friend, whatever that moment was for you, I want you to realize the holiness of that moment. I want you to see that the state you were in, that’s God heart for you. Not the anxiousness and half-heartedness you might find yourself in. It doesn’t mean all our moments will be like that one, but the beauty of a life lived with Jesus is that there is a peace that surpasses our circumstances. A wholeness of heart that can transcend our broken situations.

I think for too long we have been letting our circumstances determine the way we live wholeheartedly. This IS not God’s heart for us.

If we want to be wholehearted, we have to know and have a true understanding and love for the Father’s heart.

When we know the Father’s heart for us, everything changes.

Most of you know King David. He was the appointed King of Israel from the tribe of Judah. He was an unassuming shepherd who God chose to use in mighty ways. In humility toward God, he accomplished great things in his life, check it out:

• A humble leader – and from him we get the phrase “man looks at the outward appearance, God looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)
• A fierce warrior, to the point he had songs sung about him in battle.
• He killed Goliath – enough said.
• He escaped death countless times and then extending mercy to those who tried to kill him.
• He is the writer of most of the Psalms (think NYT best-selling author and top Christian Album on Apple… no big deal.)

And don’t get me wrong, David also had a past. He was a murderer and an adulterer, but still God saw David as a “man after his own heart.” If anything, this points to the goodness of the unconditional love of a Father.

And the Lord makes a covenant with David that he IS the rightful king of Israel, and that his throne will be established forever.

David had many children but one of his children was Solomon.

And one of the greatest tasks of David’s life was to prepare for a temple to be made for the Lord’s presence. He was old in age, so God charged Solomon to build it.

David knew as a Father that he had to prepare everything for Solomon to be able to pull this thing off:

“David said, “My son Solomon is young and inexperienced, and the house to be built for the Lord should be of great magnificence and fame and splendor in the sight of all the nations. Therefore, I will make preparations for it.” So David made extensive preparations before his death.” (1 Chronicles 22:5)

He prepared every stone, gold, silver, bronze, iron, all workers, all positions, musicians, gatekeepers (security), treasurers, military, and every single other thing he would need.

Maybe you need to hear that today, that your Heavenly Father prepares for you exactly what you’ll need to accomplish what He has called you to.

David did it ALL.

And at the very end of his life, he gives a monumental speech and prayer to the people of Israel and to his son.

If you’ve ever seen someone at the end of their life, you know that they use their words wisely. We should all pay attention to this charge.

He prays this prayer for his son and God’s people:

“O Lord our God, all this abundance that we have provided for building you a house for your holy name comes from your hand and is all your own. I know, my God, that you test the heart and have pleasure in uprightness. In the uprightness of my heart I have freely offered all these things, and now I have seen your people, who are present here, offering freely and joyously to you. O Lord, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, our fathers, keep forever such purposes and thoughts in the hearts of your people, and direct their hearts toward you. Grant to Solomon my son a whole heart that he may keep your commandments, your testimonies, and your statutes, performing all, and that he may build the palace for which I have made provision.” 1 Chronicles 29:16-19

What a beautiful prayer. Solomon doesn’t pray that God would make his son rich, established, or “successful”, but wholly sincere and dedicated to God. That’s the good news – that we have a God that just asks us to be whole. Not perfect, but whole. See there’s a difference.

Perfection is about achievement.

Wholeness is about giving what you have.

Perfection is all about the end result.

Wholeness is about the journey.

Perfection is about pride.

Wholeness is about humility.

David didn’t need his son to be perfect, He just needed him to give all that he had knowing that God would sustain him. Knowing that the good work he had begun in him, HE would bring it to completion (Philippians 1:6).

Hopefully right about now if you appreciate a good story, you’re asking the question, well… did he? Did Solomon remain wholehearted?

Here’s the bad news…. no, he did not. He did for a while, but he didn’t stay dedicated to the one hope that God had for him. And it’s interesting because there are three main factors that drew him away from wholeheartedness that I believe God wants us to be aware of as a warning so that we might resist the schemes of the enemy.

Let me break this down.

       1. He loved the things of the world more than the things of God.

Solomon does what was commanded of him, he built the temple, he asked for wisdom, and things seemed to be going well. The people were happy. And then there’s a shift.

Because God blessed Solomon’s reign, the riches and honor came flooding in and with that, Solomon shifted from worshipping God to allowing others, and eventually himself, to become to object of his worship.

He loved that people came to him for wisdom, the wisdom given to him by God. (1 Kings 10:24)

He loved the gifts more than the Giver and kept them for himself. (1 Kings 10:25)

He loved receiving glory and status more than giving all the glory to God. (1 Kings 10:18-21)

       2. He let the wrong voices be the loudest voices.

Over time, Solomon acquired many wives of foreign women who worshipped other gods. These voices, the closest voices to him, because the loudest voices in his life. (1 Kings 11:1-4)

Before you think this isn’t relatable, don’t underestimate the power of even one relationship having a huge impact on your wholeheartedness. Some of you might not even have one wife or husband, but you follow more than 100 people on Instagram, right? Each of those voices you’re letting speak things and ideas into your life without even knowing it.

The voices we let into our life will either lead or mislead us into intimacy with our Heavenly Father.

       3. He filled the wrong temple.

Solomon thought he was wholeheartedly serving the Lord by building the temple as he asked. And he did to an extent. But why do you think that God wanted the temple in the first place? So He could be with us. So He could fill us with His love and presence.

The temple was God’s way to be with us. To dwell among us… and Solomon missed it. He was so caught up in doing, achieving, completing, that he left vacant the main thing God wanted to fill, which was himself. Friend, God wants us. Anything He asks us to do will only be a means to an end to bring us to him.

David asked Solomon to be whole – to have an “undivided” heart to build the temple. But really it was never fully about the building, God wanted to fill a different empty space.

And maybe today as you read this, there are idols, or some spaces, or some voices that need redemption today. If so, God is near, and loves doing the impossible.

So Solomons life ends with bondage to idolatry and a love for the world over God. (1 Kings 11:6)

I know this feels discouraging because we love a happy ending.

But praise be to God, there is one.

Solomon wasn’t the golden child of David, but God the Father was faithful.

So much so that when Jesus puts on flesh to enter the cosmos, he is called the “son of David” (Matthew 12:23).

See, Jesus was wholeheartedly devoted to the things of God. Jesus lived a perfect life. Even when met with temptation of worldly status, he rejected it by becoming a humble servant.

When the wrong voices tried to speak into his life, he retreated to let God be the loudest voice.

When everyone around him was trying to earn salvation by works, he purchased that salvation through pouring out his blood for us.

In Solomon we see failure, in Jesus we see fulfillment. Through Jesus, now we are the temple that God wants to fill. (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)

This IS the Father’s love on display.

SO HOW DO WE LIVE A WHOLEHEARTED LIFE?

You see, the first thing said about Solomon was that he was loved from the start. (2 Samuel 12:24)

So today, know that you’re loved. Know that God wants to be the ultimate Provider for you. If He sent us Jesus, won’t he give us everything little thing that we’ll need? Just like Solomon, won’t God our Father provide? (Matthew 6:27-31)

Through Jesus, God has made a way for us to be a recipient of wholehearted love.

What a kind, loving Father we have.

If you want this today, or if you want to go deeper into a life of wholeheartedness, I would encourage you to repent, which means “to turn” away from the things leaving you less than whole.

The good news is that it’s through the Father’s kindness that leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4).

It’s his kindness, it’s his LOVE that gives us a whole heart. What a whole hope we have today through the loving Father and the perfect son.

Morgan Krueger is part of Team LO and loves any opportunity to hear someones heart. In her free time she loves drinking coffee with friends, watching British baking shows, and leading their local church’s young adult ministry in West Monroe, LA with her husband, Ryan.

The post Wholeness For the Weary Soul first appeared on Live Original.

Grab phone.

Face ID.

Alarm off.

Home button.

Click.

Scroll.

Scroll.

Click.

Swipe.

Swipe.

Like.

Scroll.

Like.

Refresh.

Swipe.

Swipe.

Scroll.

Toss.

Roll out of bed.

Philippians 4:6-7

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

2020. Thanksgiving. For a lot of us, putting those two words together feels like a bit of an oxymoron right about now. Thankfulness is the last thing we feel. And for so many of us, the feeling and reality of loss is a very real thing this year.

Millions of people lost their jobs in 2020.

Millions of lost loved ones.

Millions more sick.

And even if you aren’t in this category above, in some way or another, this year’s residual effects and massive life changes have impacted you emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

So, we can all agree it’s been hard, it’s been beyond challenging, and it almost feels like more than we can bear.

But…. what are we going to do with it?

So many of us start our days with the routine laid out above. We wake up. We grab our phones. We scroll. We search to be numbed. We search for an escape. We search for meaning. We just want a little peace. But we’ll never find peace if we’re not willing to fight for gratitude where it’s meant to be found. As long as we turn to temporary pleasure, we’ll be stolen from, actually straight up robbed of our souls in 2020.

Because truth is, we’re not getting out of 2020 unscathed. In fact, 2021 holds no promise of the “end” of what’s been challenging this year. I love you enough to tell you, 2020 will leave a scar. 2020 will wound us. So, knowing that we won’t escape the troubles and tribulations of the broken world we’re living in, what will you do with it? Will you let it be a holy scar? One that points to the glory of God? One that cries out, “This was painful, this was scary, this was one of the hardest things I’ve faced, yet God took it and used it for good. Let me tell you about my God through this scar.” Or will you let it be pain for the sake of pain without any ounce of purpose?

See, God never intends for our pain to be purposeless.

But in the wrestle, you might get bruised, you might end up with a limp, but you get God.

 The apostle Paul put it like this: “Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ.” Philippians 3:8

Paul’s list of “wants” doesn’t look like ours today. Ours often look like this:

To ace our test.

To get the promotion.

To have our family perfectly healthy and safe.

To keep our jobs.

To have a comfortable home.

There is nothing inherently wrong with this list, but let’s compare it to Paul’s:

To know Christ.

Like Paul, if we truly desire God’s presence, we would give thanks in all circumstances.

Because God’s presence supersedes circumstances.

Have you ever thought about your biggest breakthroughs with God? Haven’t they in some form or fashion been connected to trials? To the lowest of lows? That’s not a coincidence. This is more because of us than God but it turns out we realize we need God a WHOLE LOT MORE when everything is stripped from us. And God never wants to be picked last, but in his mercy, He’ll take it. He’ll use it. And He’ll blow you away with His presence when you have nowhere else to turn.

And because God supersedes circumstances, gratitude supersedes circumstance.

God just wants us to want Him, friend. When we want Him, we give thanks for Him, not our good (or bad) circumstances. We actually give thanks for Him regardless of our circumstances.

What if our gratitude simply came from who God is and the fact that He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever? (Hebrews 13:8)

What if our gratitude was rooted in the fact that we can know God because his son Jesus came down to earth and put on sin for us, so that we could be made right with God? (2 Cor. 5:21)

What if?

He is God with us, our Immanuel. And because of Him, we can give thanks for the good, bad, hard, messy, and beautiful.

Friend, Jesus lives. Now that’s something to be thankful for. 2020 can take so much from us, but nothing can separate us from the love of Christ. (Romans 8:38-39)

So, this year, when it would be so easy to throw in the towel, don’t let anything steal your heart of gratitude. But instead, throw off your anxieties, and with thanksgiving, simply tell him what you need, and receive the peace he gives through His presence and through His son Jesus.

“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18

The post What’s Stealing Your Gratitude? first appeared on Live Original.

Isn’t it crazy how there are literally years of your life you can’t vividly remember and then there are some days that you’ll never forget? This was that day for me (YES that’s little Morgan!) Also shoutout to my mom for unapologetically rocking that fresh bowl cut and retro glasses.

This was the first day I ever heard the phrase “faith like a mustard seed.” This saying comes out of Matthew 17:20-21:

“He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”

When this picture was taken, it was at the land that my small Christian school was praying to build on. That day, we all got in a circle, read the scripture out of Matthew, and all buried mustard seeds in the ground. I remember making my hole, shoving that little seed in there (I wasn’t the most graceful kid), and filling the hole the best I could with the surrounding dirt and rocks. I think a reason I remembered it so well was because it was such a foreign idea to me.. and sometimes still is. But, I believe God was showing me something that day that brought me all the way to writing this post.

What I didn’t know was that this little girl in the picture wasn’t just planting a mustard seed, but instead a biblical truth was planted in me and since that day, has grown and grown.. and grown.

Here are some facts about mustard seeds:

They’re either going to produce one of two things: Mustard Plants or nothing. You’re not going to get tomatoes from a mustard plant (sorry ketchup lovers).

The mustard family includes a variety of plant species, spread all over the world: white ones, black ones, brown ones, and other variations like Florida Broadleaf, Green Wave, Southern Giant Curled, Tendergreen, Red Giant, etc.

They don’t take a lot of “effort” to grow: just a little consistent water and sunlight each day.

Unlike other plants, almost every part of the mustard plant is usable.

They have incredible “bioenergy” just like humans! Meaning, even just one mustard seed measuring 1 millimeter in radius, generates a bioenergy field of 100-millimeter radius! What this bioenergy ultimately brings is healing. Healing to itself and everything surrounding it.

I could easily take all of this info and say “LOOK! YOU are the mustard seed!” But friend, the truth in love is:

Unlike mustard seeds, we try to produce things that we were never created to produce

Unlike mustard seeds, we can’t bring about unity and diversity on our own.

Unlike mustard seeds, we overcomplicate our faith, our relationships, and our call to love daily.

Unlike mustard seeds, we close off and compartmentalize parts of our life and say, “God could never use this.”

Unlike mustard seeds, on our own, we can’t bring about the healing that we or our world truly needs.

So… what is the mustard seed?

If you read earlier in Matthew 17, you see Jesus take three of his disciples (Peter, James and John) up to a mountain and they saw the transfiguration of Jesus. CRAZY STUFF! Literally his face “shining like the sun”, his “clothes becoming white” and then boom, out of nowhere, Moses and Elijah join the party. Can you imagine?! Jesus displayed his full wonder and splendor to his besties. After that sight, what else would they need to have the faith to perform the wonders and miracles that Jesus would empower them to do?

Right after, it’s told to Jesus that his disciples (most likely Peter James and John leading the charge) weren’t able to cast out a demon in a boy. Jesus, in love, then follows up their question of “why couldn’t we do it?”, with (paraphrasing) “Have faith. It can be the size of a mustard seed. That’s enough for my power to rest on you. Then, nothing will be impossible.”

I challenge us all to see the mustard seed in us today as Jesus, not our own strength. Just like Peter, James, and John, our efforts will sometimes fall short if we are leaning on our own strength. But seeing our mustard seed as the faith of Jesus in us puts HIS power and glory on display knowing that we can do what he is asking us to do, even if our faith is the size of a 1 millimeter mustard seed.

We can go out and produce fruit 100 fold with that kind of faith.

We can celebrate diversity and can bring together black, white, brown, and any other variation of God’s children with that kind of faith.

We can grow by just standing in the light of Christ and drinking from HIS well with that kind of faith.

We can actually influence those around us with that kind of faith.

We can be who we were created to be with that kind of faith.

Just like a mustard seed, you are allowed to start small and let God be big.

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

The post What’s Your Mustard Seed? first appeared on Live Original.

Fam, what a year it has already been! I don’t know about you, but there is a stirring in me for God to get in my heart and take care of some of the hard stuff that maybe I didn’t want Him to touch in 2019.

I’ll say this upfront so you’re not mad at me later: this might be the last blog you want to read today but the one blog that you need to take in.

Maybe in 2019 you were hurt by something (or more accurately, someone) and you have carried it into this decade. And maybe everyone around you is living all freed up and joyful (in our flesh, that can be so frustrating, can’t it?) and you can’t quite get there because of some resentment that has been hard to let go. I feel you. I sit here writing this post on forgiveness feeling deeply convicted over a relationship with someone that I have yet to forgive from almost a year ago.

So, what if today, right now, you and I take a dive into the Word that wants to do a new thing in us this year? A good work in and through you and I that will cleanse us of bitterness, resentment, and anger from the pains of the last decade?

What I do know is that hurts run deep, and I would never want to minimize that. But what I also know to be just as true if not truer, is that God’s grace for us (shown through Jesus) runs deeper and has more power than resentment ever could.

Let’s start being the forgiven who forgive because of The Great Forgiver.

We’re taking a look at 10 verses on forgiveness that have the power to do the seemingly impossible. You’ll find a question below every verse as well to pray through or journal them out. Don’t rush through this! Take your time, let Jesus speak, and ask Him to guide you as He pleases for the purpose of forgiveness and letting go of the past.

1. “If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to five us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:8-9

You probably didn’t think I was going to start with a verse on our own sin, did you? That’s right, before we can ever hope to forgive others, we have to acknowledge and be confronted by our need for forgiveness. As much as it isn’t fun to think about, God sees all sin as equal and you and I are just as in need of forgiveness as anyone else.

Is there something you need to be forgiven for today? I encourage you to first confess to God and then confess to anyone you need forgiveness from. Let’s forgive from a fresh place of being forgiven!

2. “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:31-32 

Paul (the author of Ephesians, speaking to the church in Ephesus), encourages us to “put away” everything that would hinder us from offering forgiveness to those around us. He explains a few verses earlier in chapter 4 to put off our old self, the self that only follows our desires. The old self holds on to past hurts and bitterness, but the new self, found in Jesus, hands our hearts over to Him to be healed and softened toward forgiveness.

What are some differences in your old and new self?

3. “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.” Colossians 3:12-13

We just looked at what we are told to “put off”, and in this verse, we are shown what to “put on” as our new selves. Putting on these characteristics of Christ is our only path to true forgiveness.

What are some ways you can begin to put on and practice the qualities of Jesus?

4. “Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent’, you must forgive him.” Luke 17:3-4

Jesus, speaking to his disciples (and you and I), is asking a big thing of us here. He is showing us that we must stay uncapped on our forgiveness. We are called to forgive for every trespass done against us, and especially when our brother or sister comes to us in repentance. And guess what was the disciples immediate reply in verse 5? “Increase our faith!” They KNEW that this was an impossible task without Jesus doing a work in them.

Do you find yourself limiting your forgiveness? Is there a specific person it is harder to forgive?

5. “Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.” Luke 7:47

Jesus is so rich in mercy! Jesus is speaking to a pharisee who was offended by the service that a “sinful” woman was offering Jesus by washing his feet. The lesson here? When we know the depth that we are forgiven, forgiving becomes the better, freer option, rather than judgement.

Do you live like a child deeply forgiven by Jesus? Does this affect the way you forgive?

6. “Now if anyone has caused pain, he has caused it not to me, but in some measure — not to put it too severely — to all of you. For such a one, this punishment by the majority is enough, so you should rather turn to forgive and comfort him, or he may be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. So I beg you to reaffirm your love for him … Anyone whom you forgive, I also forgive.” 2 Corinthians 2:5-8,10

Do you mean it when you say you want people to know Jesus? If so, forgiveness is the best way to show them that you forgive because you have a forgiving God and that they aren’t as far away from Him as they think. In fact, He is ready to welcome them home as soon as possible (Check out the prodigal son in Luke 15!)

How can you show the forgiveness of God through the way you forgive?

7. “And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” Mark 11:25

What Mark is saying here is that prayer should be an integral part of our daily prayer life. Did you catch that? Every time we pray, we need to practice bringing our hurts to Jesus and forgiving anyone who has hurt us. When we do, we have freely received the forgiveness that’s offered to us.

How can you incorporate forgiveness into your daily prayer life?

8. “Come now, let us reason together,” says the LORD. “Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool. – Isaiah 1:18

We see here the type of forgiveness that God offers. As you can see, God never partially forgives. His forgiveness is wholistic, turning what is completely blood stained into blemish-free. For us, this means that our forgiveness must also be full and impartial.

Is there anyone you have partially forgiven that you need to extend FULL forgiveness to today?

9. “And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” And they cast lots to divide his garments.” Luke 23:34

One of the last things that Jesus did on earth before He died was advocate for forgiveness. He knows that without forgiveness, we can’t be fully free.

Have you fully accepted and received Jesus’ forgiveness for your sins paid for on the cross? If not, He is ready to show you His forgiveness today, friend!

10. “I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.”  Isaiah 43:25

God doesn’t just forgive us, He chooses to “remember our sins no more”. He lives like our past sins are not a part of us. What a gracious act of love! Maybe you feel that you’ll never be able to forget the pain of the past, but through the power of Jesus, you do have the ability to love people like they never hurt you. Through Jesus, we can be free from holding onto those pains and love without boundaries.

Friend, I hope this was a challenging and fruitful time and that God has prompted you to journal some prayers of forgiveness, call a friend for an overdue conversation, or even finally walk in the forgiveness that you’ve been given!

Forgiveness is one of the hardest realities on earth, and that is why Jesus had to die one of the hardest death to overcome it. But He did it, for us, and now we get to be the recipients of a forgiveness that is immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine.

The post 10 Bible Verses on Forgiveness first appeared on Live Original.

“You’re such a hypocrite, Morgan. All the things that you said you stood for, you have thrown out the window. How could you do that? Hurt your friends, give yourself away, be so selfish? Good luck trying to have God, someone else, or even yourself love you after all that you’ve done.”

This was something that was actually spoken to me by a “close friend” roughly ten years ago. Can you believe someone actually said that to me? Even as I type it out, it truly is appalling. She is the kind of person that, deep down, I know doesn’t have my best interest at heart, is more interested in manipulating me then actually knowing me, and who doesn’t believe in grace or the power of redemption.

From the start, I really never trusted this person, but the sharpness of those words actually stuck with me. Not just stuck with me, they marked me. Broke me. Changed me.

As much as I wish I could say that was the only time this happened, it wasn’t. You know those people that seem to follow you everywhere? It’s like come onnnn, of all people, really, THIS friend?? This girl has to go to the same college as me and continue to say hurtful things to me? This person HAS to take note of every new place I was going, every effort I made to escape my past, and follow me there?

I’m sure you’re thinking, “How can ONE person have such a grip over your life? After all, it’s only one opinion.”

The reality is, having someone in your life that is a loud competing voice even amidst the dozens of friends that tried to convince me that the mistakes I’d made, the sin I carried, the choices I had made apart from Jesus didn’t define me anymore, eventually ‘the one’ had the final say.

Over the past ten years, this destructive friend who spoke these lies over me eventually caused such a massive buildup of shame.

To understand WHY this happened (trust me, this is just as much for me as it is you), let’s go wayyyy back to the garden in Genesis 3.

“So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.” Genesis 3:6-7 (ESV)

 Friend, do not mistake this act of hiding as a fashion statement. The symbolism seen through the context of shame brings actual tears to my eyes and a pit in my stomach.

Up until this point in all of creation (we’re only two chapters into the beginning of time, but still, you get the point), there had been no separation from God. That means ZERO HIDING, ZERO COVERING UP, ZERO SHAME.

This act of hiding and covering themselves was an entirely new thing. This is so foreign to us today because clothes are a fundamental part of our everyday lives (I hope), but in the garden of Eden, it just wasn’t. It wasn’t, because they knew that they were created in the Image of God and it was a beautiful thing for the Creator to behold its perfect creation. No one told Adam and Eve to do what they did. It was pure instinct to cover their bodies directly following this act of disobedience.

I want you to hear this loud and clear: If love is the first most powerful force on earth, shame is the second.

Shame lies. Shame comes to steal, kill, and destroy. Shame tells us to take hold of another cup than the cup of our double portion. Shame tells us that our inheritance isn’t as beautiful as promised by our heavenly Father and that we should take matters into our own hands. Shame covers up and scatters our lives into a million little pieces.

And that is what it has done for me. I let the shame of my past steal so much from me. On certain days it feels too strong to bear. Shame brings back memories that I would do anything to forget.

But in the midst of my endless fights with that voice, I know there is something else that covers. Just as one person can have such a grip of lies on me, there is One that has a stronger grip of freedom laid out for me.

God knew what the fig leaves meant. The day that sin entered the story is the same day that God started His eternal pursuit to win us back to Him.

“And the Lord God made for Adam and for his wife garments of skins and clothed them.” (v. 3:21)

Did you catch that? God made garments of skin and clothed them. This implies that He sacrificed and slaughtered an animal for his children in order to give them a better covering.

 If this isn’t foreshadowing, I don’t know what is. Since the beginning of time, God was setting up the narrative for Jesus, the perfect sacrifice, to come, die, and trade our pitiful fig leaves for an eternal covering. This is where freedom is found.

Shame scatters, Jesus gathers.

If what you’ve read today resonates with you, please know you’re not alone in this moment. The truth is, I still have that friend in my life that occasionally makes cutting remarks to resurface my past, making me feel so hidden in fig leaves that I can’t tell where the shame ends and I begin.

Even last night, I went to a class taught by one of my mentors. She was laying out the concept of time and God’s plan for the fullness of it. I came alone, sat down in my chair, looked up, and you won’t believe it…THE FRIEND WAS THERE. I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.

I felt so anxious the whole time knowing she was in the room and fought back tears at the thought that she would call me out.

At the end, my mentor asked everyone to write out this question: “God, how do you see me?”

Check out my answer…

No, you’re not seeing it wrong, I didn’t write anything.

The minute I wrote that question on my paper, I felt it so clearly that the word God was giving me was “proud.”

This word TERRIFIED me. Proud? There’s no way, and I had a person in the room that would agree with me. So, I sat there, fighting back tears, looking for the closest exit and some fig leaves laying around, just in case.

I actually left the night writing nothing in that space and I still haven’t.

Amidst all the fighting voices, I sit here (with tears in my eyes and hope in my heart) choosing the better portion and good cup. With that, I want to make two confessions.

First, the friend who has followed me everywhere is me. But it’s actually not me, it’s shame. It’s rooted in lies. Yes, it’s been around for so long it almost feels like a part of me, but it’s not who I am. I am choosing to not allow that voice in my life anymore. I know I will have days when I doubt, but right now, I am walking away. I will not let shame have the final word. It’s been too long, and I’m done.

Lastly, how does God see me? HE’S PROUD. Because of what Jesus has done, I have been redeemed, made new, and been forgiven. I’ve taken on my true identity; a daughter who makes her Father proud.

This truly is the beautiful inheritance–trading fig leaves for freedom.

“Instead of your shame there shall be a double portion; instead of dishonor they shall rejoice in their lot; therefore, in their land they shall possess a double portion; they shall have everlasting joy.” Isaiah 61:7 (ESV)

Morgan Krueger is part of Team LO and loves any opportunity to hear someones heart (or their enneagram number).  In her free time she loves drinking coffee with friends, watching British baking shows, and dreaming big with her husband Ryan and puppy June in Franklin, TN.

The post From Fig Leaves to Freedom first appeared on Live Original.

I looked in the wrong people’s beds, in the acceptance of my friends who weren’t going to point me to truth, and to endless scrolling on social media. I was hopelessly trying to convince myself that the key to finding myself would dwell there. But it didn’t. I was still in hiding from those around me and to myself.

And here’s the problem- if you stay hidden, you can’t experience the true beauty of living in awesome, real, and life changing community. Community always comes at cost.

It wasn’t until I went on a summer mission trip my junior year in college that I got to experience what it means to live in a true community.

In a land far, far away where they eat hot noodles for breakfast and babies wear split pants (I would say google it, but it’s too risky), I embarked on a seven-week mission trip with twenty of my closest strangers to China. I didn’t know a soul and they definitely didn’t know me (After all, if they really knew me, would they realize that I didn’t even belong on this mission trip? Would they actually realize that I was more of a mission field than the Chinese students we were there to share Jesus with?). For better or worse, we dedicated those weeks to spending every moment together.

I wasn’t too worried. After all, I was a skilled imposter and knew how to put up invisible walls that would keep people from really knowing me. They knew my name was Morgan, that I loved Jimmy Kimmel (way more of a Fallon fan now), and that I had an interest in knowing Jesus.

And if I’m being honest, I preferred not being known. It’s easier, way more comfortable, and it’s the only form of community I had ever known.

Then something happened, or should I say, someone happened.

Rachel, a girl on my trip, was funny, confident, and bold in her faith. She didn’t take herself too seriously, but girlfriend knew what she liked and how she liked it. She also knew she loved Jesus and wasn’t afraid to live like it.

There was a moment on that trip that forever changed my perception of what it meant to know someone and be known.

One afternoon, Rachel and I were drinking our zhen zhu nai cha (bubble milk tea) and walking to hangout with some new Chinese friends. She shifted the conversation to ask how the first week was going and how could she pray for me.

It sounds elementary, but the way she approached me and the genuineness I heard in her voice was something new to me. Having grown up in the church, I briefly remembered it from my childhood, but hadn’t experienced it my adult life. (If you want to call twenty an adult. Hey, it was the oldest I had ever been.)

It just so happened I was having a hard time with being in a foreign country, all the while trying to maintain a persona that wasn’t me out of fear of being known. So, in that moment I made a choice to open up. I shared with her that she could pray for my anxious heart and my faith to believe that God could use me to bring others to him.

With an attentive ear, she listened, seemed to really care, and opened up about what she was going through as well. Ending with a bond over our love of chocolate, we arrived at our destination with a new found friendship.

I felt a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Something that seemed so small on the outside was a big deal to me. She made me feel loved and known.

That night, we all arrived back at our dorms and I was exhausted, to say the least. It was a hot summer and we were constantly translating the bible into what seemed like an impossible language. My brain was as exhausted as much as my body was!

As I walked in my room, I noticed something on my bed. It was a letter from Rachel written on a card clearly bought at a Chinese convenient store. I opened it and there was a prayer she had written over what I had shared with her earlier. At the end of the letter was more encouragement and a P.S. that said, “Check under your pillow”.  Under my pillow was my favorite kind of chocolate. I just sobbed. I mean, RACH! What a saint.

Not only did we share our love of Chinese food and chocolate, we shared our hearts that day. Rachel let me know that she had really listened to me and cared about me.

Why do I tell you all this? Because the way we love people and the willingness in our hearts to invest in others will take us farther than we ever thought possible. It will allow us to ride the wave of first time acquaintances into an authentic relationship. Friends, I don’t have to know you to know you long for this. I know this because this is God’s plan for you:

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.” Colossians 3:12-14

Since that trip, Rachel has been one of many that God has placed in my life to love me, challenge me, and just plain bless me with their presence. Lord willing, I have been that person for people along the way, too. You see, Rachel didn’t just teach me about friendship, she showed me that God always sees me and loves me (as I am), and that walking in a close relationship with him brings light to darkness, which ALWAYS brings freedom. Relationships on earth reflect the Father’s heart.

Based on all the lessons I’ve learned and missteps I’ve taken, here is, in my opinion, the truest form of how to walk in genuine, true, life-giving community.

1. Be vulnerable:

This is maybe the costliest part of living in true friendship. In Genesis 3, we learn from Adam and Eve that hiding is a direct result of sin. The bible tells us that sin separates us from God. Although we have different wardrobes today, some of us put on metaphorical garments of leaves in an effort to hide and stay unknown daily. But that isn’t the way it is supposed to be. God loves you too much to let you stay in a hiding place. When we open up and share our lives with others, we are reminded that we’re never too far away from God’s true plan for our lives. When Rachel asked how I was doing, I had a choice. I could take the easy route and tell her that “I’m actually doing really well!” or I could, with tears in my eyes, let her in. It was just one moment, but I hope you can see how important it was. By doing that she brought Jesus to me. When I couldn’t bring myself before Him, she could and did. Is there something you need to open up about today? Take that step of vulnerability, He will use it mighty ways.

2. Embrace conflict:

As it turns out, Rachel and I continued to be good friends. After college, we went on to live together in China for an entire year. She continued to be the biggest blessing to me! We learned a lesson of embracing conflict along the way too. Being a nine on the enneagram, my biggest need in life is peace, specifically, with those around me. There were moments when Rachel and I were not living in peace, mainly because of my pride. I wanted to be important and valuable to the team and, because of that need, I felt threatened by Rachel’s natural leadership ability.  Unfortunately, this brought out some of my insecurities and there was a season where we felt distant from each other. Rachel came to me one day and (in vulnerability) let me know that she felt like she had struggled with some pride in our relationship. Seriously? Me too! Both of us had soft hearts toward each other, but we struggled with communicating it. Once it was out in the open, we could deal with it. The trials of conflict, if handled in love, will always strengthen a relationship. Don’t shy away from them, friends. But, be wise and gentle in your speech as you address the problems.

3. Don’t make it about you:

If vulnerability is the costliest part of community, not making it about you might be hardest to implement. I don’t know about you, but I can be so selfish. Even when I do something good that I know God has called me to do or say, I have this little voice in the back of my mind saying, “That made you look really good, keep it up.” The imposter is at it again, just in a different form. Striving and self-centeredness belong nowhere near authentic living. Helen Keller says, “There is joy in self-forgetfulness. So, I try to make the light in others’ eyes my sun, the music in others’ ears my symphony, the smile on others’ lips my happiness.”

I’d like to pray this over you: “God, thank you for authentic community. Thank you that it is your good design, however costly in the moment it may seem. I pray for my friends out there that may have lived in hiding for years. I pray against the imposter in their hearts whispering, ‘If they only knew….’ God, would you break chains and produce more relationships that lead in vulnerability, healthy conflict, and self-forgetfulness? Thank you that you are for us always being known in community. We love you. Amen”

I want you to know Rachel and I are still close to this day. She stood by me in my wedding, and although we live far apart now, she still sends me letters reminding me that I am loved.

I pray you find your Rachel, and through those around you, see your Jesus.

If you read this and are looking for a place to start, consider joining our online community of sisterhood, LO Fam. Workshops, bible studies, and exclusive content created just for you. Join today!

The post How to: Live in True Community first appeared on Live Original.